Monday, April 26, 2010

More Things I Know About Poets

Nobody is just a poet
even the really good poets
who are just poets.

Poets who favor the first person can be narcissistic.
Poets who write in the third person may have multiple personalities.
Sooner or later, everyone gets mental whether they write poems or not.

Poets who are parents of infants sound optimistic.
Poets with teenagers learn to stop making declarative statements.
Poets who get caught with teenagers are degenerate bastards.

Girl poets have better tattoos in better places.
Some guy poets have colorful tattoos
but only from a distance.

Never show someone your poems
on the first date.
Poets who proclaim their love
using only poetry are spineless.
Never tell your girlfriend’s parents
that you’re a poet, it sounds too much
like a shoe-maker or a barrel-maker.

Poets who break up with someone
using poems are pathetic.
Partners of poets who break up
because of their poems are literary critics.

Villanelles are beautiful but technically hard.
Assonance is illegal is some southern states,
but it’s fairly common in Europe and
readily available in Amsterdam.

Some rock lyrics are poetry, but
some rock lyrics are poetic crap.
Jazz and poetry are soulmates joined at the genitals.

Many poets used to drink Absynthe
but it got expensive and rare.
Now it’s making a comeback.
Some poets are blessedly sober
and for many, we like them better that way.

Anyone can be a poet.
Not everyone can be a poet.

~ J. D. Mackenzie

(inspired by Jill Crammond Wickham's NaPoWriMo prompt for Day 25, Scraps)


  1. If you continue in this vein your poetic licence will be revoked.

  2. Some truths, some half-truths and some downright untruths here. But all worth thinking about!

  3. This is certainly something to ponder JDM.

  4. viva la villanelle! (One of my favorite forms, perhaps it will be my May focus?!)

    In reviewing old (from 2002) poetry, I found a very different Julie within the words....

    Thank you for the truthfulness found here...

    Read my Day 26 poem here:

  5. Hey JD--I enjoyed this! Is it your most "poetic" work, nah, but it was enjoyable! Loved the line about jazz and poetry. And yes, I'm getting tired, too. Don't know what I'll do about today's, because everything I'm working on feels like crap...(I guess that shows how tired I'm feeling.)

  6. ''Jazz and poetry are soulmates''Yeah!

  7. There wasn't a single part of this I didn't like, especially the first date / breakup/ barrel making parts.

  8. There are so many observances here and some really great lines. I like the matter-of-fact opinion you show. I like to write in a matter-of-fact way myself. 'My poem. My opinion. Deal' I love it!

  9. ok... so I've read in the comments that this isn't your best, that just makes me look forward to filing through your posts. I've already read this one 3 times: love it, making sure I love it, definitely loving it! Jazz and Genitals in the same statement just reeks of a Clark Kent hidden super-power!
    P.S. Thanks for the compliment(s)~

  10. Well I'm going to throw a spanner in the works as far as jazz and poetry are concerned - but it made me laugh! As for assonance, that's a downright slur - but that made me laugh too!

  11. i laughed i cried

    Jazz and poetry are soulmates joined at the genitals.

    i admit it - - a new love interest showed me her poems too early in our relationship and I bolted. they were really bad. i'm such a snob.

  12. This is hands-down a fantastic poem!!! Seriously, you must pursue publication on this one. I love it! So true.