Tuesday, July 6, 2010

So, You Really Want to Direct?

That’s it?
So you really want to direct?
You think it looks easy?
Maybe it only looks easy
because I make it look easy
Maybe if you knew how hard it is
to get most actors to act
then you’d mind your own business
of flubbing lines and tripping on your tonsils

This is inane
You have no script
You have no budget
You’ve given no direction
I am a professional!

Try something else

I’m your new Patriot Act
Everything breath you take
I’ll be watching you
Even when you’re sleeping
Especially when you’re sleeping
Except you won’t know it’s happening then
But I’ll be here stalking you

Use your imagination

How about a close shot?
Since you were too cheap to get a real location
let’s do this scene close up
dressage scar and all
no room for error
no need for second takes

Dig deeper

Well, here we are lost on an island
and our options for optics are quite limited
use that if you like for an ophthalmology exam
but don’t even think about it for gynecology

I need more anger

Who’s tripping on their tonsils now
Mr. ex-boyfriend director?
Did you even know I played Portia in Ashland
and all three witches in Macbeth
when the other two called in sick
because I could?
And where the hell is my Evian?

Much better
We’ll work it out in edits

~ J. D. Mackenzie

[Based on the following Poetry on Wednesday Week 10 prompt: the prompt for this week is the photo shown at http://rallentanda.blogspot.com]


  1. J.D. This is fantastic! I felt like I was eavesdropping on an authentic conversation. This is a well constructed piece. I enjoyed the read.

  2. Uncanny. He is still working as a director but you could not possibly know that. Love that Sting song. Clever the way you incorporated it into the poem. LOL at three witches in Macbeth
    because the other two called in sick. You are being a veritable Boy Douglas this week ?

  3. Tough life for real act-ors. Hope the final cut makes it worth while...

  4. Wow and triple wow. Please will you direct me? I'm sure I'd become an overnight star with your kind of insight.

  5. You've caught the neuroses of the artiste(s) perfectly, JD!

  6. I love what you did here. 'flubbing' is a fantastic word!


  7. Nice scene, JD. and it ends with my own philosophy.

  8. And where the hell is my Evian? Great line among many great lines, JD! Skillfully written ... and directed!

  9. JD a very well constructed poem.
    Loaded with humour.

  10. JD--Always love reading your pieces! What a great little scene you have going on, and so many priceless lines, like about tripping on the tonsils, the Evian, the medical exams (!), and more.

  11. I like the badinage, and the boasting. Mixing the Police lyrics with a reference to the Patriot Act (and stalking) was inspired.